hold me, wrap me up (enfold me, i am small)
by softiesharpie
Summary: This is a re-write of the Legends of Tomorrow season four finale. It mainly is somewhat of a character story with Avalance and some background Natari. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters in this story. No hate to Behrad or the actor that plays him, I actually like him and I'm excited to see grown up Behrad in season five. This is just an alternate ending.


Ava could feel the adrenaline pulling through her veins.

Everything had happened so fast. One moment she's videoing Sara and Nate's admittedly corny play and the next, there is a portal opening to hell and NeRay is chanting. The only thing she could think about was that Sara was too close to the opening.

She watched John Constantine converse with the demon before getting choked and Ava had to admit, she didn't want John to die. If someone would have asked her months ago if she would've cared about John dying, her answer might've been 'no'. She and John's... whatever they were... began with a rocky start.

Ava remembered hating him, hating when she saw him on the Waverider, hating that he looked so comfortable there, and felt so welcome, when Ava, at the time, still felt out of place with the Legends despite having a developing friendship with them. But, as she watched the life drain from his eyes, her chest felt heavy with... pity? Maybe regret? She didn't know.

But then, Nate walked over and waved his hand in front of his face, revealing himself to be John all along. That confused Ava even more.

She listened to the explanation, slowly coming to realize that John and Nate has discussed this plan, a plan in which would free Ray from Neron at the cost of Nate's life.

Despite her efforts to keep a neutral expression, she couldn't help but let her face fall into a frown, tears blurring her vision. Nate was one of the first Legends to make Ava feel like she belonged on the ship. When Nate joined the Time Bureau, their companionship developed into a friendship, and Ava would've never expected this. Nate was the man who made fun of her and her other agents' outfits, when they first met, the same man who annoyed Ava to no end when she first started talking to the Legends.

But now, she felt like she lost someone deeply important to her, someone she would most definitely miss.

She glanced over at Sara, who mirrored the heartbroken look on her face.

"Sara, I—" Ava was cut off by her time courier beeping erratically.

She cleared her throat and answered it, "yes?"

"Director, I felt the need to inform you and the team that Miss Tomaz is on her way to Heyworld. If she does this she could—"

Ava interrupted Gideon, "she could lose all of her current memories."

"Yes, Director. Please help, I don't know what else to do."

Ava sniffed and looked down at Sara, not knowing what to do. Ava didn't like to not have a plan, she didn't like feeling lost like she did then.

"Go stop Zari. I can't lose her too." Sara said and angrily wiped away her tears, upset with herself for letting this happen.

Ava nodded and turned to leave when Zari ran into the room.

"Nate!" Zari cried and fell down on her knees next to his unconscious body, taking his hand in hers. "No! You can't be de... Nate please!" She shook his hand frantically, as if that would somehow revive him.

Ava's heart broke at the sight but she forced herself to not start crying, she needed to be there for Zari and the rest of the Legends.

"Zari... you can't be here. Your memories... they aren't safe." Ava said and kneeled down next to the crying girl.

"But, Nate!" Zari protested.

Ava's lip trembled as she swallowed back her tears, taking Zari's hand in her own. "I know, sweetie. But, there's nothing we can do about this. We just need to get you back on the Waverider before your memories are lost." She said, trying to think logically and letting her emotions take the backseat.

"I can't leave him!" Zari said adamantly.

Ava bit her lip and looked up at Sara, who was looking at her with wet, pleading eyes.

She looked back at Zari and cleared her throat, "Zari, look at me." She said in a firm voice.

Zari looked up.

"I need to take you back to the ship. We can't do anything about Nate... but, I know he wouldn't want you losing your memories because of this. C'mon, Z. Please?" Ava's eyes looked desperate.

Zari seemed to ponder that for a moment, feeling her mind begin to become hazy and she panicked, quickly standing up. "We have to get back to the ship!" She said, Ava standing up and opening a portal to the Waverider with her time courier, quickly walking Zari through it before it closed.

Ava let out a sigh of relief, knowing that if Zari would've stayed any longer, her memories would have been gone and replaced.

"Thank you, Ava."

Ava barely registered Gideon's voice, noting that was the first time the A.I. had called her by her first name.

"Oh, Z..." Ava said softly, seeing Zari break down into uncontrollable sobs.

"I can't believe he's really gone." Zari whispered, slowly walking over to Ava, her hesitance almost palpable. While she and Ava had become friends, they weren't incredibly close. But, Zari wanted someone to be there for her in that moment, and Ava looked just as hesitant about comforting Zari.

Ava didn't know who made the first move, but one way or another, she and Zari ended up hugging tightly, sobbing into each other's necks.

"I'm so sorry, Z. I'm so sorry." Ava whispered over and over until her words become incoherent, overtaken by her sobs.

"It's not fair. He didn't deserve this." Zari cried, tightening her hold on Ava. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt this much heartache.

Things had always been good with the Legends. Everyone was always safe, Zari supposed she got so used to Gideon being able to heal them that the thought of death was more of a distant thought when they were defeating villains.

"I just... everything's always okay. I was so used to it being okay..." Zari rambled, hoping that Ava understood what she meant.

Ava did. She knew about Zari's past, she had read her files, and knew that Zari felt safe with the Legends. She knew that even though the Legends risked their lives everyday, Zari liked the comfort they provided, the sense of security she hadn't felt in awhile. Everything always turned out okay, as long as they had each other.

Ava knew firsthand what that was like, to become so comfortable with one's situation only for one thing to ruin it all. She thought back to a year ago when she found out her origins. Before that, she never doubted her identity or her overall abilities, she knew that she was cocky sometimes and, at the time, felt like she had every right to be. The clone thing had broken her. She felt like everything she knew about herself was a lie, that she wasn't even a real person, just some science experiment. The stability that she'd built up for years at the bureau had all come crashing down in 2213.

So, in that sense, she could understand why Zari felt the way she did. She also couldn't imagine something like that happening to Sara, and how she'd react to that.

"Sorry to interrupt. But, I think you two should look at the surveillance footage." Gideon's voice interrupted the heavy silence that had only been filled by rough sobs.

Ava pulled away just enough so she could shuffle them over to the screen and look at her. Her eyes widened when she saw everyone standing in a circle, singing James Taylor. "What the..." she trailed off, seeing Tabitha's staff start to glow bright purple.

"G-Gideon... what's happening?" Zari rasped out, her face still partially hidden in Ava's shoulder.

"It appears the team and the civilians are attempting to bring Mr. Heywood back to life with the power of love." Gideon said, like that was the most normal thing in the world.

Hope flared in Zari and Ava's chests, was this really happening?

"He's coming back?" Zari asked, her eyes red and puffy with tears, as she watched everyone sing.

"I cannot scan his vitals, but it appears to be working." Gideon replied.

Ava let out a sob as she watched Nate's eyes open. "Oh my god." She said, grinning as Nate sat up only to be immediately surrounded by the team, excluding Zari and Ava. The team all hugged Nate and cried, even Mick shed a tear. For, even though he liked to tease Nate about his small hands, he couldn't imagine the team without him.

"He's back! Oh my god, Ava! Do you see it?" Zari said, grinning as she pulled away from Ava, her eyes not leaving the screen.

Ava chuckled tearfully and nodded, "I see it, we are looking at the same footage." She dryly said, wiping away her tears.

The team helped Nate stand up and started leading him out of the building, heading towards the Waverider.

Ava heard the door of the ship open and Zari ran, faster than Ava had ever seen her, into Nate's arms, sobbing into his shoulder.

Ava smiled and walked over to the team. "God, you scared the hell out of me, Heywood." She said and sniffed, not having the energy to try to hide how relieved she was that he was safe and alive, and that she didn't lose Zari or Nate.

Nate looked up at her and grimaced lightly, "yeah... sorry about that." He pulled away from Zari before smiling, "come here." Is all he said.

Ava blinked. She walked over to him before she was pulled into a hug, Nate seemed to have known that she wouldn't have initiated this by herself. She hugged him back, sighing softly. "Wow, what a day." She chuckled and pulled back, turning her attention to Sara. She could tell that there was a battle raging in those stunningly blue eyes and gave Sara a look that said, 'we'll talk about this later'.

The team, now coming down from the adrenaline rush they'd all been having for the past few hours, retired to the living room to watch a movie, giving Ava and Sara time to talk.

Ava took Sara's hand and gently led her to the galley so they could have some privacy.

"What's going on, babe?"

Was all Ava had to say before Sara looked on the brink of crying again. "I almost lost another member of my team... again. I should've known that John and Nate had been coming up with a plan like that. I'm the captain, it's my responsibility to keep my team safe. And I failed. I failed him."

Ava opened her arms and Sara fell into them without hesitation, letting herself be held by the love of her life.

"You didn't fail him, Sara. You couldn't have known that they were planning this. No one could've. Nate willingly sacrificed himself, he wanted to. You know he's always been willing to do anything for Ray... he'd never let him be forever bonded to Neron." Ava whispered, kissing Sara's head.

"I'm sure Nate doesn't feel the slightest bit angry with you, or feel like you failed him." She added and Sara sniffed, staying quiet for a moment and letting the feeling of Ava's fingers running through her hair soothe her into a contented state.

"What about Zari? She has to hate me for letting Nate do that." Sara finally said.

Ava shook her head, "she doesn't hate you. You didn't 'let' him do it because you didn't even know it was happening."

Sara nodded silently and tightened her arms around Ava, feeling comforted and calmer than she did before. Then, she remembered the look on Ava's face when she thought Nate died and knew she needed to check in on Ava.

"What about you?"

Ava furrowed her brows, "what about me?"

"How are you holding up? With what happened to Nate and taking care of Zari."

Ava bit her lip, averting her gaze. "That's not important. The important thing is that Nate and Zari are okay. And that Neron is finally gone for good."

Sara sighed, used to Ava downplaying her feelings. "Aves, look at me." She said softly.

Ava took in a deep breath before looking down into Sara's eyes.

Sara noted how red Ava's eyes had gotten, and how filled with sadness and distress they were. Sara's heart ached at the sight and all she wanted to do was make Ava smile again.

"Your feelings are important, and I want to be there for you, if you'll let me." Sara said, looking at Ava hopefully.

Ava sighed resignedly and said, "it's just... so much happened today, you know? And I felt so lost when Nate... when he sacrificed himself," she couldn't say 'died', "I didn't know what to do... one moment I'm feeling pity for Constantine, which is something I never thought I'd feel, and then Nate's gone. And... and Zari needed me and you know I'm not good with feelings. I didn't want to screw up... I knew it would make things worse if Zari lost her memories. I was scared to mess up with her... we are friends, but we aren't as close as I am to Nate. Zari needed me to be her shoulder to cry on and I was scared I wouldn't be enough."

Sara kissed Ava's cheek, "were you?"

Ava looked confused, "what?"

"Were you enough? Were you what she needed?" Sara asked.

Ava smiled tearfully and nodded, "yeah... I was. We hugged and cried together... we didn't talk much. But, then again, sometimes talking isn't necessary. Then Gideon told us to look at the footage and we saw you all singing Nate back to life."

Sara laughed at that, "it sounds kind of ridiculous when you say it out loud."

Ava giggled, "no more ridiculous than saying that you all defeated a time demon by becoming a ginormous beebo and hugging it to death."

"We've done some crazy shit, haven't we?" Sara said and grinned.

Ava snorted, "that's putting it lightly." Her smile softened when Sara looked at her with so much love in her eyes, Ava sometimes still didn't think she deserved this.

Sighing, Ava pointed out, "we still have to figure out what to do about Zari's memories... and until then she has to stay in the temporal zone."

Sara nodded and her smile faltered, "how are we going to fix that?" She asked.

Ava shrugged, "I don't know yet. But, whatever we do, we'll do it together. All of us, as a team."

Sara teased, "Ava Sharpe not having a plan? Shocking."

"Oh shut up, you goober."


End file.
